Digging Up Cervantes Bones in Madrid: EXHUMES ME????!!!!

Cervantes is the very dead Spanish writer of Don Quixote. Researchers in Madrid are winding up a long, confusing adventure to identify the writer's bones, since we're approaching the 400th anniversary of his death/tourist trap. Madrid Mayor Ana Botella delivered the awkward announcement that they maybe sort of possibly found fragments of Cervantes.

But everyone’s having a hard time ignoring the uncanny truth: the search for bones without any DNA comparison is exactly what the hapless Don Quixote would be doing in 2015.